Will an INFJ cheat in a relationship?
Like any other personality type, the same principle applies: yes, it’s possible for them to cheat.
But the real question is when, why, and with whom. While we may not have all the answers, we can provide a decent explanation as to what makes INFJs more susceptible to cheating.
Now, I’ve known INFJs who are in long-term relationships. I’ve known others who thrived on staying and loving their significant others despite the scarring setbacks. All I can say is, dang, they’re pretty loyal partners.
But today, we’re not only discussing INFJ’s loyalty. Instead, let’s determine whether they’re capable of cheating, too.
So, will someone with an INFJ personality ever cheat?
Let’s talk about it.
INFJ and Relationships
As strong and natural empaths, INFJs are sensitive to identifying other people’s moods, emotions, or intentions.
Because they’re human lie detectors and can read people’s intentions easily, they catch on quickly to the lack of genuineness, thus making it hard to settle with a romantic partner that goes below their moral standards.
So once they find someone who passes the tests, INFJs stick.
In addition, INFJs are loving, caring, and supportive partners. As I said, these empaths have a sharp radar for others’ feelings and may get overly concerned to the point where they feel responsible for it. Say, when INFJ senses you’re dispirited and miserable, they’re urged to reach out, ask, and comfort you.
If this is how INFJs feel toward their friends and acquaintances, what more if it’s a romantic partner? Their empathy with their significant other amps up. They become attached and set their partner as priority more than anybody else.
Moreover, INFJs look for depth and meaning. They won’t settle for anything less than true love or long-term companionship. They will commit to you their time, emotions, growth — themselves as a whole. I must say, INFJs are romantics who will try hard — and fight for love — to keep the romance and connection alive.
One word, commitment.
Will an INFJ Cheat?
Now, we established how INFJs value their relationships. However, we need to understand that regardless of the process, the depth, and the connection built, the question we have now is: if an INFJ ever cheats, why and how?
Many INFJ forums seem to unite by denying the possibility of them cheating in a relationship.
However, we can’t deny that a personality can deviate from its usual stereotypes.
Yes, most INFJs wouldn’t cheat because they have high morals and deep attachments with their partners. But with other INFJs, they may have experienced cheating mainly because of these reasons: being ignored and being unable to confront the issue head-on.
Let’s go to the first one:
INFJ Cheat When They’re Deeply Ignored In A Relationship
When INFJs feel ignored in a relationship, their initial response is to console themselves. But at times, when they’re too emotionally unsatisfied and misunderstood, being an extraverted Feeler (Fe), they unconsciously look for redirection to appease those emotions.
And what do they find? A person or an object to lean on that will help them work on their emotions better.
If it’s a hobby they spend their time on, that’s great. But in other cases, they may find someone, who likes to talk to them too, to subdue their dissatisfaction. It’s because, as you see, INFJs crave that connection and mutual understanding.
Most of the time, this progression leads to INFJ’s emotional cheating. They may not cheat in the form of physical affairs, but they sure enjoy the secret company and conversations.
They keep a secret closeness and share their deepest thoughts with someone else. It may come off as being too friendly or even flirty. But sometimes, they don’t accept or deliberately call it “cheating.”
“I’m not cheating; we’re not saying ‘I love yous.’ I’m not crossing the line!” An INFJ might argue.
But you’ll know it’s emotional cheating when that INFJ tries to hide their connection with others, keeping their primary partner ignorant of what’s happening.
INFJ Cheat As A Counterattack
INFJs aren’t the most vocal, but they sure are sensitive individuals.
Sometimes, they know things don’t add up and feel something’s off about their partner. They may open up about the topic, but at the end of the day, they won’t push it to avoid arguments.
For the sake of the relationship, they had to put up with the toxicity and slights they encountered. However, here’s where the lack of trust fosters in INFJ.
These empaths can hold grudges when slighted, so if you’re cheating or putting them into an abusive position, they may just simply do the same to you.
Do you play around? I play around, too.
You enjoy being with your friends and leave me behind? I’m gonna do that, too.
But remember, INFJs have more tendencies to carry out their morals.
Most INFJs don’t trap themselves in situations like this. They have high tendencies to carry out their values, more than seeking revenge on their partners.
If they were to bring forth deceit, you could hear many INFJs confess how they drown in guilt.
How Do INFJs Deal With Cheaters?
Cheating on an INFJ leaves them unmendable wounds forever.
Yes, INFJs are forgiving people. Cheat on them, and they may still accept you despite the internal friction and depression you caused them. However, there’s no “forgive and forget” with INFJs.
Your mistakes will haunt them so hard that even seeing a single object can trigger a burst of flashbacks and emotions. Back to zero.
So to their cheating partners (who got caught) but still are in a relationship with them, apologizing isn’t enough. It will be a continuous fight to prove your loyalty.
Now, if you ever mess up again despite an INFJ giving you chances, you better be careful. One grave mistake and they might already be plotting a grand ‘surprise’ for you. Watch out!
Conclusion
To conclude, there is no one answer to why an INFJ would cheat.
At the end of the day, we can’t really tell if anyone tends to cheat based solely on their personality type. However, we can predict its likelihood by learning what clicks and icks them as we try to understand their values.
I hope this blog is helpful. Thanks for reading!
-M.Mathias
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